nothing you own is yours

Every decision is a battle of logic. Need VS Want. Principles VS Fun. Loyalty VS Stand. As the outsider, it is easy for anyone to see someone else go through that personal conflict and wonder "good heavens, why is it so hard for him/her to decide...I would know which way to go off the bat!" Trust me, I myself am guilty of being one of those outsiders but it isn't right to belittle someone's problems or simply enforce an answer on them. How would we like it if we were famished and we're down to our last ten bucks and we just really want to buy that Macdonalds meal and someone goes ahead and buys nasi lemak with your cash and they insist their logic on why they made that decision for you. That is just food. Sometimes decisions are life changing and it is best made by the person who is going through it because they're the ones living through the repercussions or results. If it is a mistake, it'll soon be a lesson. If it isn't then celebrate with them after.

I tried enforcing my logic on people before. It works out fine sometimes. It worked out great for others and sadly for some it turns out I should have kept my opinions to myself. You just got to trust that with or without you, The One up there is looking out for the person. All you need to be is a listener. The tongue can do right or wrong but the ears always present a one way route. When in doubt, use the ears.

Anyway, sometimes I wish Life didn't present me with this opportunity to choose between fighting for what I deserve and fighting for what I'm willing to give. But that is like questioning God why is He moulding me for the better? Whichever I choose, isn't a bad decision which is why it is so hard. For months I thought I did make a decision but sadly it was a decision made for me. See that is another problem with allowing others to enforce their opinions on you. Further down the road when the choice presents itself before you again, suddenly you're unable to stand on your two feet. Reason being : initial decision wasn't made wholeheartedly by You.

Anyway, I'm kind of glad I have this cold so I have time off from thinking too much. Reminds me that there are worse things that can happen to me. Cold was so bad up till two days ago, I was literally googling "what God wants you to realize when He gives u challenges". I kid you not!

To the people who only want the best for me. Thank you. With all your guidance, I'm much smarter with dealing with my emotions and only settling for what is best for me. However things play out with the decision I will eventually make, you should believe that I am happy with it. I love you guys.